An Ode to my Father

My dad, a man of honour, charisma and charm. A man that knew how to charm the ladies whilst only ever having eyes for my mum. A family man, a businessman, a good man. A man who left a legacy that I will forever hold dear in my heart.

Almost six years ago, my wonderful dad lost his battle with stage four brain cancer. A heartbreaking moment in my history, yet bittersweet as I knew that his suffering had now come to an end.

The start of my dad’s journey into descent was also the start of my journey into finding my voice. Having suffered six years of ill health myself, I had become deeply disturbed with how our current medical system treats illness. My eyes had been opened to the insanity but my voice was still closed off to the fear of the repercussions of speaking out. 

A week before my dad’s diagnosis, the gentle whisper of spirit’s voice hit my mind like the clashing of beating drums. ‘Your dad has cancer Niaby and it is time for you to start writing – writing from the heart as you now have a story to share with the world’.

I fought against spirit’s prediction with all of my might. I promised to lose my fear of speaking out if only my dad would be saved this suffering, but his suffering had been pre-ordained. The beautiful soul of my father had already agreed to give his life in order to give me my voice. 

And as the tears roll down my cheeks as I start to tell this story, I feel my dad gently stroke my hair to let me know that he is still there. I hear my dad gently whisper words of encouragement in my ear as he tells me that he is still by my side. I sit here gratefully knowing that that which my father gave his life for will be fulfilled through me.

It has taken me many years to find my voice, to truly believe in myself and what I have to say. To wash away the cobwebs of unspoken words that were left unsaid through fear of the words of others. To find the power deep within myself to honour my dad and all that he gave up for me. But now my voice is like a beautiful storm, bursting powerfully through me, wanting to be heard, knowing how to express fearlessly with wisdom and grace. Now my voice holds clarity, passion and power. Now my voice is listened to, respected and heard. Now my voice changes lives as it gently, gently inspires others to be the best possible version of themselves. Now my voice is golden as I respectfully honour all that my father was and all that he gave to me.

On the 1st of November 2015, I finished writing my channelled book “The Spirit of Life’. That same spirit who had delivered my dad’s diagnosis revealed his identity to me only months after we put my dad to rest. His introduction to me turned out to be the first page of my book – a book that I did not know I was writing until some time into the journey. 

The powerful words of wisdom that come through in this book will help many people over many lifetimes. Whilst I finished channelling it back in 2015, spirit would not allow me to release it until last year. As I re-read these incredible words during lockdown, I realised that this book had been channelled for this very time in history and finally I understood why I had not been allowed to release it before.

The 1st of November 2015 was my dad’s first birthday since his passing. I had been due to start a trek to Everest base camp on the 31st of October 2015 but due to the delay of my luggage, I did not get to start until the 1st of November. As I sat there on the first day of my trek, on the beautiful mountain of Everest, something that I had spoken of to my dad on his death bed, I had no idea as I started channelling that my dad’s birthday would be the day that I concluded my book.

My dad is deeply interwoven into everything that I do. He is the strength that holds me, the courage that pushes me and the compassion that guides me. I hear his words in the wind, feel his presence in the rain and his love as the sun shines its rays upon my face. I see him in my dreams as he encourages me to turn those dreams into reality. As he helps to ignite the passion that I have always held inside of me, waiting to be seen, waiting to be heard, if only it had not been engulfed in fear.

My dad has taught me that there is nothing to fear, even though fear still tries to take me. He has taught me to shine my light of love on the world, even when the world does not shine its love back. He has taught me to be me, in all of my entirety, even when the world is not ready for the full force of who I am. 

My dad’s legacy lives through me, inspiring people to be who they are. Inspiring people to see truth, even when the truth does not want to be seen. Inspiring people to know love, even when they grapple with hate. 

My dad’s legacy lives through me for I am now being all that I can be in honour of my dad’s sacrifice. I am now encouraging others to be all that they can be, for I now recognise that we are all The Kingdom, the power and the glory, forever and ever, Amen.

I have published this here on my website today, the 1st of November 2020, in honour of my dear dad who gave me everything.

You can read  The Spirit of Life book here to see the power of the wisdom which my dad gave voice to, through me.

First posted on Thrive Global founded by Arianna Huffington with a mission to end the burnout epidemic with sustainable science based solutions that enhance well-being.

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